Comments on: Can’t Orgasm? http://www.smutandsteff.com/2006/02/cant-orgasm.html Sat, 13 Mar 2010 21:59:22 -0500 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.6 hourly 1 By: vee http://www.smutandsteff.com/2006/02/cant-orgasm.html/comment-page-1#comment-12700 vee Mon, 14 Dec 2009 17:21:12 +0000 http://www.smuttysteff.com/?p=563#comment-12700 thanks so much. i've been a 13 year realationship and shit just needed to fall apart. i guess you can love some one and it still just not to ment to be. so another of lifes new chapters begin and you start to realize there's shit about yourself that you polietly stashed in the denial part of the brain. all the little images that were stashed away in your mental spank bank come out on a slow drip drip and soon the the cup of im not like that becomes just one sip. its strange really i was trained since birth to be a servant, to family, to my husband, even my profession is in caring for others. i was taught not to ask for much and to be anstipatorily in wait for the sole purpose of whomevers comfort. i do not see this as a bad thing, this to me was something to be proud of. i excell at this, to learn to detail preferences of someone, that there comforts are met and remembered to such detail it would boggle the mind. its just that come to find out those of which i pandered to just didnt deserve it. i'm 29 years old and i'm sick of being nice.the people that know me best say i'm a walking contradiction. i just say i'm confused how do you know your self, if all your life ,some one elses life ruled yours. so i left them all started a new and took control of me and only me. but forgot one little thing...... sex oh shit well its been 2yrs without it when i had it was okay ,but what ever. my girlfriends instantaiously protested but that drip drip started going pour pour. i'm afraid of rejection retaliation and judgement. i am a social extrovert charming as shit with no game. i can be who you need me to be at a drop of a hat but is scared of death to ask some one to do something sexually for me. its a mind fuck i know. i've always wanted to be in control daydreamed of if only i had the balls i would do this or that. i ld just grab him an fucking take it. it wouldnt stop these images of tying their hands above their head, blind folded while i slowly draged my nails down his arms ribs backsides while licking down his back the sound of this guy had me soaking fucking wet i almost crashed my frigging car in slow moving traffic. what the fuck is wrong with me. i cant ask for that. what will he think of me? well im not with him any more and ive only had some one else be able to make me cum maybe a hand ful of times in my friggin life that is not normal( trust me i ask my friends they thought i was joking i was mortified but i laughed it off) i want to get off. help... so i have a new arrangement in my life he's a simple comfort for me, no expectations, i will not name the puppy per say, so here goes nothing............ P.S. thank you so much for the suggestions steff i was truly overwhelmed and know i have some focus this was very hard admiting this WANT for me and i didn't feel like such a perv. And you made me feel that it was ok to try this to want this. hope you get that lap-top. Vee thanks so much. i’ve been a 13 year realationship and shit just needed to fall apart. i guess you can love some one and it still just not to ment to be. so another of lifes new chapters begin and you start to realize there’s shit about yourself that you polietly stashed in the denial part of the brain. all the little images that were stashed away in your mental spank bank come out on a slow drip drip and soon the the cup of im not like that becomes just one sip. its strange really i was trained since birth to be a servant, to family, to my husband, even my profession is in caring for others. i was taught not to ask for much and to be anstipatorily in wait for the sole purpose of whomevers comfort. i do not see this as a bad thing, this to me was something to be proud of. i excell at this, to learn to detail preferences of someone, that there comforts are met and remembered to such detail it would boggle the mind. its just that come to find out those of which i pandered to just didnt deserve it. i’m 29 years old and i’m sick of being nice.the people that know me best say i’m a walking contradiction. i just say i’m confused how do you know your self, if all your life ,some one elses life ruled yours. so i left them all started a new and took control of me and only me. but forgot one little thing…… sex oh shit well its been 2yrs without it when i had it was okay ,but what ever. my girlfriends instantaiously protested but that drip drip started going pour pour. i’m afraid of rejection retaliation and judgement. i am a social extrovert charming as shit with no game. i can be who you need me to be at a drop of a hat but is scared of death to ask some one to do something sexually for me. its a mind fuck i know. i’ve always wanted to be in control daydreamed of if only i had the balls i would do this or that. i ld just grab him an fucking take it. it wouldnt stop these images of tying their hands above their head, blind folded while i slowly draged my nails down his arms ribs backsides while licking down his back the sound of this guy had me soaking fucking wet i almost crashed my frigging car in slow moving traffic. what the fuck is wrong with me. i cant ask for that. what will he think of me? well im not with him any more and ive only had some one else be able to make me cum maybe a hand ful of times in my friggin life that is not normal( trust me i ask my friends they thought i was joking i was mortified but i laughed it off) i want to get off. help… so i have a new arrangement in my life he’s a simple comfort for me, no expectations, i will not name the puppy per say, so here goes nothing…………

P.S. thank you so much for the suggestions steff i was truly overwhelmed and know i have some focus this was very hard admiting this WANT for me and i didn’t feel like such a perv. And you made me feel that it was ok to try this to want this. hope you get that lap-top. Vee

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