Dear Toilet Paper Manufacturer:
You lied.
You said your paper was soft and pure. It is, you claim, a “premium” paper.
Sadly, my clitoris disagrees.
I don’t know if you realize, but girl parts are sensitive. Nice soft fleshy bits, hypersensitive to touch and even sensation? Very?
My clitoris feels your product isn’t premium. That it, in fact, is [...]
The BUY STEFF A LAPTOP fund!
Wouldn't it be nice if I wrote more?
I'll need a laptop then.
Any donations to PayPal will
be saved for a shiny computer. Thanks!
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OH, the things I say!
- <-- Duped by hoax. I be goofy. Whatever! Deleted. Moving on. 1 hr ago
- I have received 3 really wonderful acts of kindness from 3 completely different Twitter people in less than 24 hours. Y'all fuckin' rock. 2 hrs ago
- Once you've WISELY disabled your Formspring account, remove it from your Facebook page too: http://www.facebook.com/editapps.php?v=allowed 2 hrs ago
- <-- Gets to go to the Paralympics Opening Ceremony. See? I knew I should feel optimistic for no reason today. A darn fine Friday. :) 2 hrs ago
- Ooh. Way to throw it out of left field. What a good question. RT @AngieQuaale Is it possible he's blind and not really staring ? 3 hrs ago
- PARALYMPICS: If you'd like to watch the opening ceremony online, you can watch it here: http://ParalympicSport.TV 4 hrs ago
- I'll make a sign that says "STOP THAT". If he doesn't, next time: STOP THAT, then I MEAN IT. No? Then @mr_tits_pervert's approach is a go. 4 hrs ago
- Someone said "Buy a Taser". Bad advice. Never carry a weapon that can be reversed & used against you. Learn to fight. Learn moves. 4 hrs ago
- Great. So, now for neighbours I have Euro Couple, Hairy-Backed Artist, Tech Kid, Immigrant Landlords, & FUCKING PSYCHOTIC. This'll be fun. 4 hrs ago
- Like, hands-on-glass, facing-out-the-sliding glass door, steam-spot on glass kind of staring. Fucking creepy guy! ZIP goes the curtain. 4 hrs ago
- OMG. Creepy new neighbour. 3rd day in a row I've been chilling at some point, casually watching TV, only to look up & he's staring at me. :( 4 hrs ago
- I'll have quite the fun being the only girl there. And I'm bringing food. That makes me everyone's friend immediately. 4 hrs ago
- More updates...
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"when you're slapped,
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humprey bogart as "sam spade"
in the maltese falcon
when making peter lorre
his bitch.
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